Our new Normal

We are starting to settle into the new house slowly. We have our bed in the living room. Every room is full of boxes. We have projects started but not finished, but we have a working shower and a brand-new toilet, so we are feeling pretty uptown.

We have met quite a few neighbors who are very friendly and generous. One lady gave us a sack full of apricots and another gave us fresh eggs, and a pie, so I’m very happy about that. (Yay pie!)

I felt like I needed to find a part-time job to help out with all of the expenses of renovating, so I got a little job in a fruit stand and jam store. Unfortunately, they weren’t busy enough to keep me, so they let me go after a month. It was kind of fun to be out there amongst people again. I will continue to look for work, the cost of living seems to be rising and we still love to eat, so…

We moved into the house almost exactly a month ago. We stayed at the camper for a couple of nights when the tile was being set, and we were showering there before, but we haven’t stayed there since. I try to go out there at least once a week to check on things and to make sure the mice haven’t completely destroyed everything.

I drove out there a couple of days ago, and the feeling of loss and depression was overwhelming. The homesite already looks abandoned, and sad. I couldn’t stand to see our place like that, so I hurried, loaded a few boxes of things we needed, and left.

My mind and thoughts have been on our place since I drove off that day. We had promised each other we would come back and not let it go, but with the summer heat, our busy schedules and the remodel, we’ve already broken that promise.

I had to go out there this morning and meet with the internet guy to pick up our dish. We don’t need to pay for two internet companies. I stayed and picked up some trash that had blown in and tried to spruce up a bit. It’s not the same and I feel the loss to the depths of my soul.

We will never live in the camper again, well maybe for a temporary thing, but not long term. Looking back, I’m not sure how I did it for so long. The animals and birds fed my inner core and I know the peacefulness of the place helped so much. (Not counting our fight against the solar site last summer). Thankfully, that hasn’t come to fruition yet. We are hoping and praying it never will.

Now that summer’s heat is in full swing, I am able to tolerate it so much better in a real home with a swamp cooler and a shower every night. You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone, and then back again.

We won’t abandon our dreams forever we are only postponing them. We will live in our earthship one day. We will have a home that takes care of us out in the desert beauty we have called home for three years, just not yet.

As I was pulling out away from the camper, I looked up towards the beautiful view of Mount Garfield. I spotted a big bird soaring overhead. I decided to park the car and just watch. As it got closer and closer, I realized it was a Golden Eagle. It flew over our property, then its mate came and flew over me as well. I took this as a sign that God is always with me no matter where I go. He will not only watch over me but sustain me, and I will have abundance in all things.

Never give up. That’s the message for today.

“…I will never leave you or forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5